BarefootBlog

"Ungrateful wretch" might be a bit strong - a title I might pin on Hitler... but the notion that we actually have it pretty darn good (in spite of *very* real, albeit minor challenges), and would be better served not to feel sorry for ourselves certainly has merit. :)

P.S. about TIME blogger lets me identify myself without signing up for a silly account.

Cody, me, me.

Do you think dissapointment is only born of expectation, or can it assert itself independently of expectations? In other words, are we only dissapointed when our expectations (which we create for ourselves, by the way) are not met, or can we be dissapointed even if we haven't formed expectations?

One thing does seem clear, and I like that you made this distinction in your post, Cody: loss and pain and sorrow do seem to be different from dissapointment.

Maybe that's the answer to my question -- loss and pain can exist independently, but dissapointment is born of un-met expectations.

(Now it seems like a silly question, but thank you all for letting me figure that out publicly)

I think we all go through moments in which we tend to let our loss and pain shield our perspective from the bigger pictures and what others may be going through. We all have the option of how long we let our vision be 'blocked'. I think that is where growth occurs is when we feel our pain and loss, but then are able to move on and see the world and understand others a bit better.

I think alot of us complain and whine about insignificant things! So many people throughout the world suffer SO much, and yet it is life to them! They continue on, they keep living and working and striving to make it better! Everyday people go without food, a home, a family, they live in bad neighborhoods, have an abusive families, they deal with floods, hurricanes, losing a loved one, WARS,etc... But see, we have grown up in America, and in a relatively safe nook of the country at that. True there are still problems and sadness, but we have had so much available to us. I have grown up in small towns that are safe and out away from the pain and suffering of the world. And growing up in an atmosphere where we receive everything we need, we have our freedoms, our agency, peace, we have running water, food to eat, electricity, homes, safety, the gospel of our Lord and Savior, our families... we have become SPOILED! I, for one, could never imagine what I would do without my running, WARM water, and elctricity! To me, it would seem like life is over! But to others that is life! If I ever lost someone due to a disaster, a disease, an illness... it would seem terrible and yet... million of people lose loved ones everyday due to the circumstances they live in! They don't have the same medical means to cure illnesses as we do, they live in a place that is more prone to crime, wars, a place where the climate is more likely to have natural disasters, etc... We have become spoiled, and when things aren't handed to us or our normal happy lifes are disrupted, it CAN be hard and painful if we forget how blessed we truly are! I think in those moments we realize how petty we have been, we should take it as an oppurtunity to humble ourselves before the Lord and thank Him for His mercy and all the many blessings He has poured upon us! And then... get up off our rumps and help someone in need, even if it may be someone in need of a compliment, some food, or a new coat and shoes! Do something to show the Lord how grateful you truly are!

Another's suffering does not diminish your own, so despite all the other suffering in the world--your pain is just as real.

The perspective gained by knowing of the existence of others pain is valuable. Better, is the perspective gained when you forget about yourself.

Loss means we had something/ someone once. (Duh.) Pain results in realizing the value of what is lost. (Double duh, get to the point, right?) Why do we always assume that pain is a bad thing? Unpleasant and unwelcomed, yes, but is it not the bitter that helps us realize the sweetness that was? Since we are nothing of ourselves and truly do not merit what God gives us, it is a blessing to have lost, because then we have had. Make sense? I would prefer to live this way. To feel, to truly be alive. It is in dying that we are made alive. Emotionally, spiritually, even physically; Christ being the "author and finisher"--the giver and the taker, and the giver at last. Where, as we read in Revelations, He will wipe away all the tears from our eyes and there will be no more loss because all that is His, can be ours...

Christ, who gave up all (not to mention, so did His Father) and loved completely, suffered greatly. And yet He continued on with his mission in this life despite the pain. And now, His joy is full. He knew the source of his strength and happiness and always gave praise and gratitude to the Father.

I say, "if you feel sad it's okay." Whether the loss is small or great...it's loss. Feel its value--cry, weep, wail. But then appreciate what was. Express gratitude that you knew it at all. And look around at what He hasn't taken away yet--that which you still possess and enjoy it more. That, I believe, is where we most often get stuck. We forget the gratitude because we can't see the gift before we grieved or the gift after. We see only the taking and not the giving.

Just a thought. Lengthy at that.

Suzanne- Wow. Superb, fantastic, insightful, wise. No wonder you are one of the most amazing people I know. Thank you so mucy for sharing.

"The pain then is part of the happiness now" - random quote from shadowlands, be back later

People find ways to cope. We have defense mechanisms running wild.As for other people who suffer more, they have more grace to compensate for them. We are all taken care of individually. He is an individual Savior.

The sorrow we feel is real, but the sorrow we would feel without the Savior is forgotten and instead we tend to focus on the pain we have now. Usually, for me, it is only when I look back on a trial that I can see the many ways Heavenly Father has cushioned me and turned all hard things for my gain. If I could just find a way to continually recognize blessings and not just see disappointments, then I think I would never be sad. Because they are there, the blessings I mean.

My mom gave me Shadowlands for my birthday in October. I still haven't seen it yet.

Suzanne, and Jenni, I feel I have been down the same path as you, the one of pain and loss. And it is comforting a familiar to know that I am not alone in the journey. I really feel in a deeper sense than ever that mourning with those who mourn, comforting those who stand in need of comfort is truer than true, because then can we be truly lifted from those things that bear us down.